


Bloodlines

by WritetheWrong



Category: Cukur, Çukur | The Pit (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:40:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26124379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritetheWrong/pseuds/WritetheWrong
Summary: Cumali learns the truth about Idris and Yamac - POTENTIAL SPOILERS
Relationships: yamac/cumali
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	Bloodlines

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on unconfirmed spoilers so please avoid if you don't want to be spoiled. Also never for one second can I believe we will be witnessing this but this is my attempt at therapy in trying to get my head around all of this. Yamali forever.

Blood has a funny way of looking quite beautiful in the right light, before him it trails like tear stains down Yamac’s cheeks, the wound above his eye really should have been treated at the hospital but try convincing a Kocovali to go there. The needle in Cumali’s weathered hand pushes gently through the skin above his eyebrow. Yamac doesn’t flinch. Fixes those doe eyes firmly on his abi as he tends to the battered young man before him.

‘Ah bebe…’ Cumali sighs. ‘How many times am I going to be sewing you up in this life?’

Yamac offers a wry smile back. ‘As many times until I die? Then you’ll beat me and sew me up even then?’

Cumali huffs. It’s true of course. He stitches a neat knot in the end of the wire and thanks allah again for his basic medical training from Pasa when he was growing up. The man had a history steeped in both medicine and armory a rarity in the world they lived in but his gifts had proven invaluable over the years to the eldest Kocovali son.

Cumali steps back, observes Yamac. The child looks a mess. He is bruised and battered. Lucky Cumali arrived when he did, racing into the hotel to find this Arik stood over his baby brother about to kick his head further in. Cumali had grabbed a queue separating pole and gone to town on the guy before Yamac had wrenched him away.

He was safe. He was alive. That’s what mattered. But Cumali feels his hands curl in a familiar rage that someone dared to hurt one of his brothers, and not just one of them but _this_ one. He will kill this Arik. Rest assured he will.

He takes a cloth out of the bowl at his side and wipes at his brother’s bloody forehead gently. Yamac is perched on a table and Cumali leans down examining his work. He does a good enough job of the blood and as he finishes he looks into his brother’s eyes checking for signs of a concussion. Yamac smiles. The little brat smiles back at his abi and then leans his forehead forward to touch Cumalis.

Cumali closes his eyes and allows him for a second. That moment of comfort. That’s their thing. Has been since Yamac was tiny. It grounds them both.

‘Thank you abi,’ Yamac says quietly. Cumali nods. Clears his throat. ‘Stop walking into traps. You’re lucky Meke told me where you were in time’.

He leans back. Picks up the bowl, heads to the back of the cafe to throw the bloody water down the sink.

It’s when he’s there that Arik comes in. Cumali is around the counter in a flash, hand reaching for his gun in his belt.

Yamac puts an arm out. ‘Abi’.

Arik is sporting his own wounds. His face is dark blue down the side where Cumali had hit him. He raises his hands in surrender. ‘I come to talk’.

Yamac and Cumali exchange a glance before the younger Kocovali makes his way to stand before Arik. Cumali moves to Yamac’s right. Yamac and Arik start throwing back and forth threats disguised like pleasantries. Cumali isn’t worried about Arik he will kill him just like he’s confident he will kill Cagatay the man who was responsible for the death of his child. All of these Erdenets will meet their end he is sure of it.

‘You will have to forgive my excitement in attacking you so unmercilessly,’ Arik is saying to Yamac, all feigned nonchalance and arrogance, ‘you see my father was there. I love him. I can never disappoint him.’ He looks over at Cumali then dead set ‘I’m sure you can relate’.

Cumali bristles. Nobody brings up his father in front of him.

‘I don’t imagine you can though Yamac,’ Arik says slowly but he doesn’t look at Yamac, the whole time, his gaze is fixed on Cumali. ‘There’s no way I could possibly do what you did. I could never shoot my father in the heart’.

There are moments in life that seem like time has frozen for a second. The cafe, cukur itself seems to still.

Cumali snorts. What is this bastard saying?

He waits for Yamac to laugh too. But there’s pure silence. Cumali’s eyes slide over to Yamac’s. He is white. Even beneath the blood, the bruises, he has a look Cumali has never seen before. But it’s not the scorn he was expecting. It’s horror, stone cold, it’s guilt.

It is as if someone has thrown a bucket of water over Cumali. Pure ice water. He stares. _He stares._ Arik is still talking but Cumali hears nothing but a rush of air in his ears. His eyes do not leave Yamac’s face. Yamac is not meeting his gaze his eyes are fixed past Arik. A thousand yard stare. And in that moment stood in Idris's cafe, Cumali is absolutely sure beyond doubt that Yamac, his bebe, has done exactly what this Arik is saying.

Cumali’s mind is suddenly imploding with his father’s grave, Yamac and Salih, _we’ve caught who did it_ , Idris’s face, Kenan, that moment in prison when he learned of his death, Baba, Yamac, death. He can’t breathe. He is frozen. He is ice.

At some point Arik leaves.

Cumali has no idea how long he stands cocooned in ice, blood in his veins frozen, heart thumping like a dead weight in his chest, his hands still covered in Yamac’s blood.

‘Abi’, Yamac’s voice breaks him out of it. And then…and then the ice immediately turns to fire. Cumali loses his mind. He sees only red, knows he has Yamac against a wall. He doesn’t see that bebe before him right now he sees someone responsible for the death of his father, the compass he built his life on. Yamac is screaming something. Cumali’s hands squeeze tighter.

‘Abi…Abi’.

Then for a second he’s back to bebe. Bebe who’s neck he has in his hands…Cumali lets go. ‘What did you do? _What did you do_?’

Yamac almost looks like he has been waiting for this. He meets Cumali’s gaze finally. He looks like he’s going to be sick. A mix of terror and guilt and pain. ‘I killed him abi’. He offers, then a sob. ‘I did it...I killed him’.

Cumali’s brain goes back, catalogues every lie told to him, every moment he asked Yamac about Idris, every word out of Salih’s mouth about finding the guy who did it, every single betrayal they have flung his way for months. He has his gun out before he even realises what he’s doing. He raises it. Yamac notices it, nods.

‘Why?’

‘I had to.’ Yamac offers back.

‘Had to murder our father?’ Cumali spits back. He’s pacing like a wild animal. No. No. No. How does this make sense? How does this possibly make sense. ‘You had to murder our father?’

‘Yes.’ Yamac offers.

‘Was it an accident?’ Cumali asks.

‘No’ Yamac states so matter of factly now. His tears mingle with left over blood on his cheeks but he is steel now. ‘And now you have to take his revenge’.

‘What?’

Yamac is really looking at Cumali now. And for a second for a second Cumali actually hates him. He took Cumali’s father. Took Idris from them. No reason could possibly ever be good enough for that.

‘You have to take his revenge abi. Somebody has to.’

Cumali has only cried a handful of times in his life. Tears roll down his cheeks now. The red mist covers his vision, his heart thuds.

Yamac puts his arms out. Spreads them. ‘Come on abi, do it. Do it. Please’.

‘WHY DID YOU DO IT?’ Cumali screams back. ‘WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?’

Yamac doesn’t answer just keeps his arms out, ‘I need you to do it abi, please, please.’

Cumali’s hand holding the gun shakes. ‘TELL ME WHY!’

Yamac looks past Cumali instead now. ‘He had his arms out just like this…just like this.’

‘WHY?’ Cumali screams.

‘He smiled at me’ Yamac says ‘He smiled at me right before…’

‘Stop it.’ Cumali says, guttural now. ‘Stop.’

‘He said to take care of the family…’

‘I said stop it!’

Yamac has got an agenda now. He can see a way in. Can see a way out for him. Instead of backing away from Cumali he moves away from the wall, he is crying, he is crying but he’s not backing away. ‘He wanted me to.’

‘He would never, he would never want you to shoot him’. Cumali screams back, ‘Tell me why man, tell me why?’

‘It was me or him’. Yamac finally says. ‘It was me or him’.

Cumali’s brain short circuits, he raises the gun higher back Yamac’s direction.

‘Do it!’ Yamac screams ‘Do it!’

Cumali’s finger shakes on the trigger. He can’t. He can’t. He lowers the gun. Turns.

‘See. See.’ Yamac laughs now “this..this is exactly why it had to be me, you wouldn’t have been able to do it.”

Cumali whirls in a second. He sees his dad’s face. Sees his dad dying, by Yamac’s hand, he squeezes his eyes shut, pulls the trigger, he pulls it over and over.

Screams.

 _'_ _Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!'_

He comes back to himself slowly. The smell of gunpowder hits his senses first. Then the silence. Pure silence after all that screaming, all that noise. It was a nightmare. Just a nightmare. He can wake up now. Only he doesn’t wake up and the metallic feels real in his hand. He drops it like it has burned him. Maybe he missed, maybe he missed. But as he opens his eyes he is painfully aware how good a shot he has always been.

Yamac leans against a table. His chest is covered in blood. His hand moves weakly over his front like he’s not sure where to place it. He keeps his eyes fixed on Cumali’s, he has an expression of surprise and approval.

Cumali stares. He just stares at him. They are both crying. Then Yamac goes down to his knees. Cumali goes down too. Horror. Pure horror. He has never seen anything worse in his life. He scrambles forward. Because he's bebe now. He’s bebe and he just shot him. Cumali just shot him and he’s bleeding and he won’t break their gaze.

‘Bebe!’ Cumali manages. ‘Bebe…bebe…bebe’. His hands shake in all the blood. He scoops Yamac up into his lap. The younger man stares up at him. Raises a hand. Pats Cumali’s cheek as he looks at him leaves a bloody handprint on the elder man’s cheek. ‘Bebe, Bebe forgive me, bebe, bebe…’

Cumali can’t breathe, he’s gasping with each word. He is instantly holding baby Yamac in his arms as he looks up at him, the baby yawning looking up at his abi with all the trust in the world. This bebe has the same look in his eye, all that trust but he’s choking, choking on blood now, it dribbles down his chin and Yamac smiles at him, hand still on his cheek. He smiles at him.

Cumali’s whole body shakes. ‘I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to.You’re going to be ok. Alright bebe. You’re going to be ok. I’ll fix it. We’ll fix it.’ His hand pushes down hard on one of the holes in his brother’s stomach. Yamac doesn’t seem to feel it, his eyes glaze over.

‘No, no, no’ Cumali says over and over, ‘stay with me bebe I’ll beat you, I promise I will beat you if you die, you know I will’. Yamac just blinks up at him, a lazy blink like he’s waking up. Except this time, he’s not waking up, he’s falling asleep.

His lips are moving and Cumali can’t hear anything over the ringing in his ears and the deafening sound of Yamac’s gasping breathes. He leans his head down, while trying to push down on one of the wounds. Puts his head to Yamac’s mouth. ’Forgive me…forgive me man.’ Yamac manages.

And Cumali is well aware this could be the last thing he ever says to him. Nothing exists outside of them. The whole world could be on fire. Cumali’s tears drip onto Yamac’s cheek, mingle with all the blood. He stares at the baby in his arms, the baby he helped raise. The one he danced with and laughed with, the one he taught to drive, the one he and selim walked to school on his first day, the one he just shot in his arms. He can’t speak. He doesn’t have the words. But oh how he loves him.

He brings his forehead down to Yamacs. _I forgive you._ They ground one another. Yamac takes a breath. Then his eyes drift close. Cumali sits holding him. Rocking him. He might be dead. He’s probably dead. I’ll be with you soon bebe. He thinks. I’ll come to you soon. He kisses his head, holds him as his life leaves.

He doesn’t register Selim and Salih arriving, nor Selim’s terrified eyes as he tries to pry Cumali’s hands from around Yamac’s unconscious form. He just holds on tighter. Doesn’t register the neighbourhood children gathering outside, not Salih grabbing dishtowels and stuffing them onto Yamac’s chest.

‘What happened? What happened?’ Selim screams. It’s the first moment Cumali comes back to himself, he finally allows them to take Yamac out of his arms. Selim looks up at him in terror.

‘I think I just killed our brother Cocuk,’ Cumali responds. Selim barely has time to register what his abi says, he turns back to trying to treat Yamac. He and Salih lift Yamac between them and drag him into a car. Cumali gets up, walks to the door of his father’s cafe. Selim meets Cumali’s gaze, ‘come, come’, he silently says. Cumali shakes his head.

The car screams away. Cumali is pretty sure he has killed him. Most people don’t survive three bullets, unless you are Cumali Kocovali of course. He walks back into the cafe, picks up the gun from the floor, his hands are covered in Yamac’s blood, the whole cafe is covered in it. Maybe this is a nightmare and he’ll wake up soon. And maybe it’s not and he just shot dead his little brother after his brother shot dead their dad.

He opens the barrel, there are still enough bullets for him. The roof is the right place. He has always felt free up there. He leaves the cafe. The children of Cukur stand staring. He feels their eyes, feels their judgement. Takes every look. He heads out, finds an alley with a starecase. Climbs up onto the rooftops. Somewhere he hears someone yelling, it sounds like Ferhat. ‘Yamac Kocovali has been shot’ he screams ‘wake up’. Cumali wishes he could.

He stands on the roof. Looks out over the town. His legs give way. He throws up, retches until he can’t anymore. He breaks down. His body is wracked with sobs. He promised his mother once that he would take the soul of whoever shot his little brother. It’s time to honour that promise. He took his father’s revenge. Now he takes Yamacs.

Suddenly he feels a presence at his side. A tiny hand on his knee. It's Yamac. Yamac when he was about six years old. He smiles up at him.

'I will beat the shit out of you if you die abi' he says, voice mocking, then he laughs.

Cumali smiles back.

He raises the gun to his temple.

‘Forgive me bebe’.


End file.
